Single life is starting to suck
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First, go here and re-read this entry(please). Now that I have refreshed your memory, I can give a proper update. It happened again. I took a much-needed mental health day. Of course when I called in I was sick with an upset stomach from some bad Chinese food. The truth is, I went to Borders Monday night with Rie. I had a very STRONG cup of coffee that had me up until 3:30 in the morning, making it nearly impossible to get up at 6:45 when my alarm clock signaled the start of a new workday. Sooo, I fabricated the bad Chinese food thing so that I can have a few extra hours of sleep. When I woke up nice and refreshed, I went shopping. What better way to cure an illness (even if it is made up)? When I made it home at 9:30 last night (after 8 hours of shopping) I was tired. I thought about calling I sick today, but remembered that the last eight hours were not spent working (unless you count walking in and out of stores, dodging rain storms by driving to the other side of town and caring heavy bags filled with new goodies). I also remembered that I really cannot afford to call in sick. It�s expensive as hell. I knew one day that it would happen. That moment when you feel like everyone around you finds happiness and love while you are at home watching Bridget Jones Diary (can�t get enough of that movie) over and over and nominating yourself as the President and founder of the Lonely Hearts Club (currently taking applications for new members). I have three good friends that will become new Mom�s this year. I have another friend that will become a bride. I�m just praying for a date with a decent guy this year while my friends are finding their soul mates, having babies and starting new lives. I keep wondering when will it be my turn. Don�t I deserve it? What am I doing wrong? Am I really being too picky? I am trying to be patient. But soon, I will have even less friends to hang out with because they will all have other family commitments. I know it sounds selfish (evidently you missed that last entry when I already explained the type of person that I am) but I am able to survive my lonely days because I have friends who will call and invite me out for an appetizer or drinks so my nights seem more bearable. What happens when they leave me out of those special get togethers and start doing stuff with other couples?? When talking to Mia the other day, we were discussing the upcoming Jill Scott concerts. Jill will be in CA next month and I bought tickets back in November because I just have to see her live. Mia also bought tickets. My friend Ty (one of the Mom�s to be) invited me to go along with her and the B/F. I want to go see Jill but not bad enough to be the third wheel. So I called Rie (my partner in crime and best single buddy around) cause she too is a big JS fan. Of course Rie wanted to go. Jokingly, I told Mia that Rie is a great date. She is dependable, she likes to travel, she has a great sense of humor, she is smart and can hold a decent conversation on just about anything, she is up for doing new things and we have so much in common. Rie is great person to hang out with, but damn, she is my cousin and I should not be forced to date my own cousin. I�m just waiting (and regretting) for the day when Rie meets her Mr. Right and leaves me in the dust, growing old and lonely with my 50 cats. Normally I sing praises to the single life. As I get older and the people around me get older and start settling down, the single life doesn�t seem as much fun when there are not as many people around you living the same life. I�m about ready to turn in my single card and resign from the prestige position of founder and President of the Lonely Hearts Club if it means having some one stable and consistent in my life who happens to be the male version of Rie (just not as short). |
2:38 p.m. || January 12, 2005 |
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