Recap
|
Now that the visit to B is over, I feel like I don�t have anything to look forward to anymore. The last few weeks he was all I could think about and I just counted down the days until I could see him. Now, I have no idea when we will cross paths again. I don�t like that feeling at all! The weekend wasn�t as perfect as I wanted it to be. It started off good, went bad and ended good. I�m not going to go into details cause I rather not remember the bad. The best part of the weekend was the drive back to the airport. We talked. We talked more in those few hours than I think we did all weekend. Sometimes talking is good. But the talk we had left me confused and with some serious decisions that I will have to make. He told me when I�m ready to be his girl, let him know. B�s friends were cool. I bonded with one of his home girls. She called me a few times when I was at B�s house to make sure I was properly being entertained. We rode to the liquor store together (twice), we danced our asses off at the party on Saturday and we laughed together so much, I felt like I had known her for longer than a day. She even came by Monday afternoon to say bye. We exchanged numbers. I plan to keep in touch (even though I�m not very good at that). The other people in B�s circle were cool too. I really like his roomy. B and his Roomy together are a bad influence on each other. The way those boys drink and party should be considered a sin. Both of them in there young age (B is 25 and Roomy is 23) are already feeling the effects of alcohol on their bodies. Both of them already have serious digestion problems (B�s is really bad). If B continues to drink the way he does, no doubt within the next year or so he will have some serious acid reflux problems. I have already warned him. He is a smart boy. He knows that his drinking is tearing up his stomach but what more can I say or do. I worry about him though. I almost feel like I have not even been gone the last few days. When I got back home early Tuesday morning, I fell right back into the funk I have been in. Not answering my phone, not responding to e-mails from friends, avoiding my family. Don�t ask me whats wrong. I just don�t know. I did take a few moments to talk to J-mac yesterday. We have been missing each other�s calls so much. He said he loves me then he asked me to marry him. He said every good deacon needs a wife. I just laughed it off and asked him how the new job is going. When I got off the phone with him the thought of marrying him crept back into my brain. I�m so sick of being alone (and it�s not normal for me to feel like that) that I seriously started thinking what it would be like to move back to Michigan and marry the boy. Then I remembered how much I HATED Michigan and how being a Deacons wife was not for me. J-mac is just a ol� school and a little to traditional for me. My idea of a vacation is not going to the National Baptist Convention (which he announced will be in Memphis this year and yes, he is going). For now, it�s back to work (only one job though). I�m looking for a new second job. One without the cruel hours. I�m going to try to keep myself busy this summer. As long as I�m busy, it will keep my mind from thinking about other stuff I have little control over. |
11:04 a.m. || June 16, 2004 |
Navigate
|
current |
THE GIRL
|
.... |
LAST 5
|
Moving day - October 08, 2007 |